He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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