So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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