party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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