My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
worst night to have a conscience
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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