Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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