I want to make a zoo with you.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize