Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
