you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
