he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
