eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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