Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
