hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize