I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
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