Sry I called you an 8
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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