I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
i out mim tonsoeep
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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