By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
