i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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