Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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