FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
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