Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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