He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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