dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Never underestimate the power of titties
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
