he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
