next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
