It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Randomize
