his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize