I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
