So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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