doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Randomize
