'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
It was confusing and full of hummus
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
i am craving dick and cupcakes
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
