I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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