This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
