Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
