No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
