How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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