You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
In the future we'll all be gay
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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