i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
