Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
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