I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
