The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize