Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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