So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I love you. Go after that dick
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize