the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
