I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
