Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
