Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
