I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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