you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
