i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
