Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
