Umm I'm too high to move.
home. puking in laundry basket.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Randomize